Miss Manners Says . . . .

My kids have been making me a little nutty lately. I think anyone who read my last post gets that pretty clearly. But still, they are stinking cute, and they make me laugh. Today I had to try not to laugh though. Alex goes to preschool Tuesdays-Thursdays in the mornings. I take him to school, but he rides home with someone else, so I don't get much of the "daily report" from the teacher. If anything big happens, the teacher tells my friend Jen when she picks him up, and Jen tells me. Today I could tell she had something to tell me by the look on her face. Once Alex got in a bit of trouble for punching another kid in the butt, so I was expecting it to be some rowdy little boy trouble. (His teacher has boys and is great about this stuff!) Jen walks up to me and says, "Alex had an accident at school today, so his underwear is in a plastic bag in his backpack, and he's wearing some underwear from school." I'm thinking he'd be wet, and I must have looked puzzled, so she says, "I think it was probably poop." Ok, now I get it. But why would the kid poop in his pants? That I don't get. Anyway, I quiz him about it when she leaves, and he doesn't want to talk about it. Says he can't remember. Hmm. Next he remembers that he really wants a treat ans asks about it. I tell him I can't remember the treat if he can't remember what happened at school, so he looks at the floor, lets out a breath and says, "OK, I crapped in my pants." I expected him to say, "Are you happy now?!?" because of his tone of voice, but that was all he had to say. I can't believe he just said those words, and I want to laugh, because my 4 year old just said "crapped in my pants," and I'm sorta stunned. I take a breath and reply, "OK Alex, but that's not the nicest way to say that. Can you think of something nicer to say?" "OK, I crapped in my underwear." Hmm. Not exactly the improvement I was looking for. I had to explain that perhaps the problem here was with the "C" word and not pants. So finally he tells me he pooped in his underwear after not mking it on time to the bathroom and can he have his treat now? Much better. I wonder if he put it more delicately to his teacher, and do I dare ask about it? I probably should focus more on the idea that this type of business really should happen outside the underwear and inside the bathroom, but I think he gets that. Anyone know of a good protocol school for 4 year olds?